Oct 28, 2009

Are friendship and love unconditional?

At first glance, you’d be tempted to say that true friendship and love are unconditional. Think deeper.

Situation 1: unconditional friendship

Imagine you are the head of a family; you have a nice position in the society, a marvelous wife, and happy kids. Your best friend has just stepped in and confessed to you that he committed a crime. You are his best friend, so he doesn’t know where else to go.
What do you do:
  • a. tell him to leave your house immediately, because you don’t want to be an accomplice
  • b. call the police to inform them, and never get in touch with him again, because a murderer cannot be your friend
  • c. invite your friend in and try to figure out a solution together

Situation 2: unconditional love

The same as above, but with your marvelous wife playing the role of the confessing murderer.
How does it feel like now? What would you do:
  • a. the same thing as you would have done in Situation 1
  • b. choose a different answer

Situation 3: just unconditional

Now you expect me to replace the wife with one of your kids. Instead of that, I suggest you ask yourself something else: is there any person in the world for which you’d preserve the same feelings after the murder confession?

If your answer is YES:
Congratulations, you are really capable of unconditional love! Your friends and your beloved ones can rely on your support no matter what.

If your answer is NO:
Congratulations, you show a higher understanding of love and friendship, you know that a person is the sum of her values, acts, thoughts and feelings. So if a dramatic change occurs, your friend/lover becomes another person, which you can no longer relate to.
What do YOU think? What is your definition of unconditional love and friendship?

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